This is a hard blog post to make. Honestly, writing at all has been a challenge lately. There is so much sitting in my head that I want to work out with paper and pen; and so much on my ever expanding (neglected) to-do list. I am realizing that it's all connected to my trauma, [...]
Category: Recovery-Drug Addiction
Biblical Response to Cutting/Self-Injury
I gave myself a rare treat tonight; a nice hot bath. As a mother of 4 (and counting) taking a bath is an indulgance I don't often get to enjoy. I was listening to an audio book of the gospel of John, when I noticed the marks all over my body. First, I looked at [...]
Why I Had to End My Suboxone Detox; And The Physical Effects of Being so Sick
Hey everyone. I spent a week in bed, unable to move without help a few feet to the bathroom. At times I laid in bed so thirsty, but I couldn't move my arm to grab the water next to me in bed. I wanted so badly to continue, but my body couldn't do it. The [...]
Suboxone Taper/detox- week 3 .5mg
Well, it's 4:30am and I can't sleep. I slept from 1-2am but my son woke up crying and wanting nurse. I had my husband bring the baby to me because I didn't feel like moving from the recliner chair in our living room. I've been on suboxone, which is a synthetic opiate medication used. I [...]
Busy Moms Still NEED to Focus on Recovery
I am sitting at my laptop, it's almost midnight. I have my Anatomy and Physiology text books to my left, my homeschooling planner for my 3 kids to my right, and I just swallowed a handful of chocolate like medicine. My 3 daughters are sleeping (for now), and baby brother is finally asleep after I [...]
Trauma and Memory Recall
Memory is a strange thing for the traumatized mind. Some memories are nothing more than apparitions of smell, emotion, and touch; try as I might to put flesh on these ghosts, they remain as formless as mist rising in the morning. Other memories are clear on the big picture yet lack details. I remember his [...]
Trigger, Trigger. (PTSD)
Where does this despair hide itself from the rest of me when life is going smoothly? Does it seep into the corners of my mouth when I smile? Does it retreat into the shadows of my insides? How can it escape notice from the very person it inhabits? Until—a nightmare during sleep opens me up [...]
