Depression, and Then Lyme Disease

Hello there readers. I have been a bit MIA lately. As should be obvious from my blog, I’m in recovery, and sometimes depression comes and saps me of the energy I need to write. Then, anxiety comes along and says “hey loser, weren’t you supposed to write a blog post already?” And then, I get more anxious and do even less, so my depression comes on stronger. What an awful cycle!

Anyway, I decided to take the kids out to a local state park. Turns out, nature here in northern NJ is wonderful for mental health but pretty horrific for physical health. As I type this, I’m trying not to focus on the terrible pain radiating down my entire jaw, and throughout my neck and head and back.

Why? Well, because apparently we live in the DARKEST CIRCLE OF TICK H-E-DOULE-HOCKEYSTICKS that’s why! Take a look.

Lyme Disease (CDC)(from CDC site)

That horrifying black hole over there in the northeast is where we live.

Now, I knew ticks were bad and Lyme was bad and that’s why we take precautions. But I never looked into it further. I had no idea I would go through days of spiking fevers, total exhaustion, migraines, jaw and neck pain until I (thankfully) discovered the tell-tale “bulls-eye” mark of a tick bite on my upper right thigh.

Now, after testing, I’m taking two weeks minimum of an antibiotic that is only somewhat compatible with breastfeeding (while nursing TWO of my children). I am trying to learn as much as I can, as fast as possible; while sitting here in a lot of pain.

I took the kids out to the state park and it was SO rejuvenating for all of our mental states. We needed that time in nature. The kids themselves kept saying it to me. I’m going to be super militant about tick safety and I will become a Lyme expert after experiencing this awful disease.

At least, for a moment, the woods were really beautiful.


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